Cultural Differences

Cultural Differences
By
Daris Howard

Cultural Differences
 Copyright 2002
by  Daris Howard
All Rights Reserved
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Eli Whittier – Man about 25-35 years old

Anya Whittier – Woman about

Eliana Whittier- Girl about six years old

Jim – Old fiesty man abou80 years old

Agnes Harris – A big strong willed woman about 40

Mabel Jaimison – A woman about 40

Elizabeth Jackson – A woman about 40 years old.  Needs to be made up to look a little heavy

Ivan – Man about 45-50 years old.  Speaks with accent.

Katiana  – A woman about 45-50 with a strong accent.
                                

Cultural Differences

The stage is set up as a living room scene, the living room of Eli and Anya.  Jim comes out on to stage with his cane walking slowly and is spot lighted.  He comes down stage center and addresses the audience.

Jim: It has been a few years, in fact around six or seven, since Eli and Anya got married and… {With a look of unbelief.}  You mean there are some of you who don’t know about Eli and Anya.  I thought everyone knew about Eli and Anya.  We’ll take a seat and let me fill you in. {Jim also takes a seat on a stool or whatever is available.} You see, Eli got engaged when he lived in England, but couldn’t find work so he set out for America to join the Quakers in Pennsylvania, with plans to earn money to bring his fiancée over.  However, his ship got in a storm and he ended up here in North Shore, Newfoundland.  We were a tough lot of lumberjacks and sailors and he became the defacto town preacher and taught reading and writing at night for free.  He worked two years as a lumberjack to earn the money to bring his fiancée over here.  During that time he stayed with me.  He wrote his fiancée every week and, unknown to him, she married the postman that delivered the mail. {Jim laughs as if reliving the moment then acts as if he is back to the present.} Sorry.  Anyway, not wanting to face up to telling Eli, Eli’s fiancée  bought a mail-order bride for him to marry.  Anya was her name.  Anya had been sold by her own father, a fact that really bothered Eli, for because of his mother’s Quaker upbringing, he disliked slavery.  To make matters worse, he was supposed to come up with a one to five dollar gratitude gift for what he thought Anya was worth.   Eli began to love Anya, but because he was reluctant to pay the gratitude dowry, feeling it was a slave payment, and due to the gossip of the town, she felt Eli didn’t want her and she left on the ship, thinking she was heading home to certain death because of the dishonor to her family.  It was at that point she found out that Eli had sold everything he owned to pay a fifty dollar gratitude dowry to show her father he loved her, but was not paying it as if it were a slave payment.  He also was not sending her home to her death, but had borrowed money to send her to California where she had dreamed of going.  Anya, realizing Eli loved her, got the captain to stop the ship and she returned and the wedding was performed right then.  I was the best man.  Always have been the best man. {Jim laughs.} Uh, that was a joke.  Well, like I said, that was around six or seven years ago.  Eli and Anya have built a nice little home on some land I gave them.  They have two sweet little girls, Eliana named after Eli and Anya and Katie Mary, named after my own sweet departed Mary and Anya’s mother, I think.  Oh,  and Anya is due very soon with their third.  I’m so excited.  The children call me grandpa and I look at them as if they were my own.  Well, I’ve got to be going.  They’ve invited me over for dinner.  It’s almost always a vegetarian affair since Anya doesn’t eat cow and Eli doesn’t eat dog, but Anya makes a mean carrot loaf.  I’m sure you would be welcome to join us.

{Lights fade as Jim goes off stage.  As the lights come back  up Eli is sitting on the couch reading a newspaper.  There are two little girls sitting on the floor playing.  If this is difficult to do with the smallest the child can have reference to her and have her not really be on stage.  Jim knocks on the door and Eli gets up to answer it.  It would be good if Jim had a distinctive knock for later on.}

Eli: Jim, come in, come in.

{As Jim enters the room the children jump up and run to meet him.  He kneels down and they throw their arms around his neck.}

Eliana: I’m so glad you could come over, Grandpa Jim.

Jim: You been missing me?

Eliana: Momma cooks better food when you’re coming.

Jim: Oh, so that’s it.  Well, I may be old, but every soiled rag still has some use.

Eliana: We were going to have spinach.  But when Momma found out you could come over she decided to do an asparagus casserole.  

Jim: What’s wrong with spinach?  It’s supposed to make you strong like Popeye.  

Eliana: But you told me it makes girls look like Olive Oil and I don’t want to look like Olive Oil.

Jim: I happen to know Mrs. Harris loves spinach.

Eli: And she doesn’t look like Olive Oyl.

Jim: {Kind of aside to Eliana.} Personally I think she looks more like Brutto.  

{They both laugh.}

Eli: Jim, you’re not helping her learn to eat spinach.

Jim: No, but we really need to eat asparagus when it’s in season.

Eliana: And spinach has a long, long, long season, longer than a summer day at the north pole.

{Anya comes in, obviously very pregnant.}

Jim: But I know something that is always in season.  

Eliana: What?

Jim: You’re momma’s cookies, at least since she learned to cut the sugar a bit.

Anya: Sorry, no cookies tonight.

Eliana and Jim (together): No cookies?!

Anya: I’m afraid not.  It’s my turn for the women’s tea this week.

Jim: You mean the women’s gossip hour.

Anya:  Mrs. Harris brought over pie for dinner so I wouldn’t have to cook more than to make the cake for the tea.

Jim: And Mrs. Harris makes great pie.  Speaking of the Harrises, Whitman asked me to drop this off to you Eli.

{Jim hands Eli a letter.}

Eli: What is it?

Jim: It’s just a letter, but Whitman said it somehow fell behind the counter when it came in and it is a bit past due getting delivered so he asked if I would mind dropping it off.  Personally, I think he was a bit embarrassed to deliver it himself.

Eli: Anya, the address is from your hometown.  

{Eli rips it open excitedly and starts to read.}

Jim: {To Anya.}  What news have you heard from home?

Anya: I’ve written every month, but not heard anything.

Eli: You’re not going to believe this.

Jim: Well, are you going to share it with us or are you waiting for a season you like?

Anya: Jim’s family, Eli, why don’t you read it to all of us.

Eli: “Dear Mr. Eli.  Ivan invested fifty dollars sent for daughter acceptance in piece of land and make much money.”

Jim: Who’s Ivan?

Anya: That’s my father.

Eli: “ Ivan  now a leading member in community.  Ivan been elected myezor.”

Jim: Myezor?

Anya: That would be like mayor here.

Eli: “Ivan happy hear of grandchildren.  Ivan say time visit.  Ivan and Katiana book passage with ship say arrive June three.”  

Anya: Oh, my heavens, that’s the day after tomorrow.  

Jim: Who’s Katiana?

Anya: Katiana my mother.

Eli: “Ship name ‘North Atlantic Passenger And Freight’.  Please watch for Ivan and Katiana for speak not good English.”

{As Eli is reading the last lines he and Jim have not noticed that Anya has wandered off, down stage left and seems very perplexed.}

Jim: So Anya’s parents are coming here.  That’s so exciting.  We’ll finally get to meet the old block the chip came from.  

Eli: I can’t wait to meet them.  Isn’t that exciting, Anya? {Suddenly realizing that Anya is upset.} Anya?  Anya, what’s wrong?

Anya: I want to see mother, but I don’t want father to come here.        
Eli: But Anya, he’s your father.

Anya: {Almost pleading.} I know how he treats me and I don’t want him in our home. {Pausing, then turning and pleading to Eli and Jim.} What if he treats me the same way?  What will my daughters think of their mother?

Eli: {Realizing the gravity of her feelings, comes to her and puts his arm around her and tries to comfort her.} Anya, Eliana and Katie will never think of you in any way besides the wonderful mother you are and I will not allow him to treat you in any way other than that.

Jim: {Also realizing somewhat how Anya feels, he steps in.} You know, you’re home really isn’t big enough for company to come visit.  Perhaps it would be better if they stayed with me.

Anya: Could they?

Jim: I’d be glad to help out.  

Anya: {Throwing her arms around Jim and giving him a hug.} Thank you, Pappa Jim.

Jim:  Of course that would mean Eli would have to come help me get the place ready.  It does kind of look like the north wind took a detour through my living room, since just an old bachelor lives there.

Eli: I’d be glad to come help you.

Jim: Let’s get started right after dinner.  Thanks to Whitman, we don’t have much time.  Now, how about something to eat?  I’m starved.


{The lights fade.}


Act I Scene 2

{The stage is set up as a dock scene.  Jim and Eli are talking with the little girls nearby while Anya is pacing back and forth.}

Jim: …and so I say to Mabel, well maybe they’re coming and maybe they’re not and maybe it’s none of your darn business.  We don’t want to act like it’s a big deal.  They’re coming to visit Anya, not have the town get all worked up about somebody new.

Eli: I know what you mean.  I could hardly walk down the street without people stopping me to talk about it.  Everyone wanted to know what …

{He is interrupted by Mabel and Elizabeth coming on stage dressed in their Sunday best.}

Mabel: Well, hello.  What are you all doing down here?

Jim: You know very well what we are doing here.  The question is, what are you doing here?

Elizabeth: Oh, we just thought we would come down to the beach for a stroll.

Jim: I would have to say you are a bit overdressed to go clamming.  

Mabel: We just like to look nice when we go out.

Jim: Nice!  You look like you got locked in a dress shop and someone threw away the key.  {Agnes comes in dressed in her Sunday best.} So whose funeral are you going to?

Agnes: I just thought since Whitman is mayor and couldn’t be here I should be here to greet Anya’s father.  After all, Anya’s father is Mayor in their home town.

{As Agnes is talking the stage is filling with other townspeople.}

Jim: How convenient, the whole town turned out for a stroll on the beach.  Looks like we’re having a bloomin’ tea party parade.

{A ship horn sounds.}

Eli: Look, here comes the ship now.

Mabel: It’s so exciting!

{Ivan comes in followed by Katiana carrying all the luggage.  She accidentally drops one.}

Ivan: You be careful of that.  I did not come all the way here to have my things broken. {Everyone gets extremely quiet.  Ivan goes up to Jim.} I am looking for husband of my daughter named Eli Whittier.

Eli: {Stepping forward.} I am Eli Whittier.

Ivan: {Kisses each cheek shocking Eli.}  You no look like rich man.  How many wife you have?

Eli: {Flustered.} Just one.

Ivan: One!  What kind of man send fifty dollar gratitude dowry and have only one wife. {Poking Eli in the chest.}  You just his servant!?

Eli: No, I am Eli.

Ivan: Oh, I see.  You own many horse then?

Eli: {Really getting flustered.} No, I don’t own any horse.

Ivan: You not own horse, have only one wife, and still send fifty dollar gratitude dowry?

Eli: Yes.

Ivan: {As if he got it.} Oh, you do this to brag!

Eli: No.  I did it because I love Anya.

Ivan: Love?  Are you stupid in the head?

Agnes: {Stepping up.} We welcome you to North Shore, Newfoundland.  My husband is mayor here.

Mabel: And I am her friend.

Elizabeth: Me too.

Ivan: What kind of place is this that woman talk to man?

{The women are really taken back by this.}

Jim: It’s different here.  Here it’s getting ‘em to shut up that’s the trick.

{Women look upset at this comment.}

Ivan: And why women not keep their faces covered?

Agnes: We don’t have to here.

Ivan: This is not modest.

Jim: Maybe, but with some of the women not covering their faces, it’s like having Halloween {or you can say “All Saints Day” or whatever fits your culture} every day of the year
          
{As the women look mad at Jim, Eli brings Eliana forward.}

Eli: Ivan, this is your granddaughter, Eliana.  (Or granddaughters Eliana and Katie)

Eliana: Hi grandpa.

Ivan: A granddaughter of mine in public?!

Anya: {Has been in the shadows but stepping up, almost in anger.} Things are different here, Pappa.  My daughter is free to be in public if she wants to!

Ivan: {Raising his hand as if to strike her.} How dare you speak to me that way.

{Eli steps between Anya and Ivan and grabs Ivans hand. Jim pulls Eliana (and Katie if she is there) behind him.}

Eli: No one strikes my wife.

Ivan: {Calming down a bit.} I suppose you are right.  You paid for her, you should be the one to make her mind.

Eli: But I…

Ivan: And she not even wear veil in public.

Jim: Perhaps Eli wants the world to see what a beautiful woman he married.

Ivan: You are all stupid-in-the head.

Jim: {To Ivan.} Let’s get you settled.  You will be staying with me.  

Ivan: And who be you?

Jim: I am Jim.  I am Eli and Anya’s friend.

{Ivan acts like he might do the kiss on each cheek thing so Jim grabs Ivan’s hand and shakes it instead.  Ivan kind of pulls back and looks at his hand.}

Ivan: Nice meet you, Mr. Jim.

Jim: You can just call me Jim.  That’s what everyone calls me, well most everyone.  {Looking at the women.}  I won’t say what some people call me.  You can follow me to my house.

Ivan: {Turning to his wife.} Bring luggage.

Jim: {Turns back and picks up most of it.} Let me help.

Ivan: If woman not carry luggage what is woman for?

{Eli quickly goes and takes the other luggage.  Anya runs to her mother and takes her arm and they exit stage right while the rest of the people, especially the women look at each other and then follow.  As they are exiting, Jim and Ivan are still talking.}

Ivan: Do you not think my son-in-law is perhaps stupid in the head to send fifty dollars gratitude dowry and only have one wife?

Jim: In this place a man can’t  handle more than one woman.  That would take a miracle.

{Agnes, Elizabeth, and Mabel now come down stage.}


Mabel: Did you see how bossy he was?

Elizabeth: And how he treated his wife?

Agnes: Why if Whitman treated me like that he’d wish he’d never been born.

Mabel: It’s no wonder Anya acted like she did when she came.  And Anya’s poor mother.

Agnes: I think we should see if Anya’s mother can come to our tea.

Elizabeth and Mabel: That’s a good idea.  Let’s ask Anya to invite her.

Agnes: This may be an interesting week.


Act I Scene 3

{It is Eli and Anya’s living room.  Eliana is busy hunting for something.  The coffee table is set for tea.   There are a couple of knocks at the door.  Eliana ignores it and keeps on hunting.  The knocking continues.  Finally Anya comes from the kitchen and goes for the door.}

Anya: Eliana, didn’t you hear the knock on the door?

Eliana: {Continuing to hunt.} Yes.

Anya: Then why didn’t you get it?

Eliana: I was busy.

{Anya opens the door.  Agnes, Mabel, and Elizabeth (and possibly more) come in carrying some sweet bread and cake.}

Anya: Agnes, good to see you.  Come in.

Agnes: Anya, dear, I brought some sweet bread to help out.  I really feel this is too much on you in your condition.

Anya: It is my week to host the ladies tea, and with all you’ve done to help, it shouldn’t be too much bother.  Besides, what does it take to boil some water?

Mabel: {Patting Anya’s belly.} It takes a baby.

{Anya laughs.}

Elizabeth: I’m so excited to have some time to get to know your mother a little better.  She is coming, isn’t she?

Anya: Yes, she is coming.

{Eliana has continued to search the whole time.  Agnes goes over to her.}

Agnes: Eliana, dear, what are you searching for?

Eliana: I’m looking for the worms I got ready this morning.  I found a wonderful new can and got the biggest fattest worms.  Grandpa Jim always takes me fishing on Wednesdays.

Mabel: From what I’ve seen, he pretty well takes you fishing every day.

Elizabeth: {To Anya.}  Do you feel it is good for a young girl to spend that much time with such a grouchy old man?

Anya: But Pappa Jim loves her so much and …

Mabel: She really ought to spend some time learning the finer arts of being a young lady.

Elizabeth: How to walk appropriately. {She walks like a duck trying to be feminine.}

Mabel: Talk appropriately.

{Everyone rolls their eyes.}

Elizabeth: How to hold her tea.

Mabel: How to sit. {Mabel sits, taking the best seat.}

Elizabeth: How to stand. {Elizabeth pinches Mabel so she stands and then Elizabeth takes the best seat.}

Agnes: In other words, with her getting older it might be a good idea if she stayed and joined us for tea once in a while.

Anya: But, Pappa Jim…

{Suddenly there is Jim’s distinctive knock at the door.  Eliana, who has been oblivious to the talk, runs to answer it.}

Eliana: That would be Grandpa Jim. {She jerks the door open.} Grandpa Jim!

Jim: {Stepping in and picking up Eliana or patting her head.} So how’s the prettiest girl in all of Newfoundland?

Eliana: Grandpa, I got worms all ready, but I can’t find them.  They were in a nice, new can too, and I was fattening them up like you said.

Jim: Now, don’t you worry any about that.  I got plenty for both of us.  Just run and get your hat and we’ll be on our way.

{Eliana runs off stage to get her hat.}

Mabel: {To Jim.} It may not be any of our business, but like we were telling Anya, a young girl should not be out all the time fishing with men.

Elizabeth: It’s just not healthy.  She should be with women, learning the finer things of life.

Jim: I totally agree with you.

Mabel: You do?

Jim: Yes, absolutely.  It is none of your business!

{Mabel and Elizabeth act very offended as Eliana comes running in wearing a fishing hat.}

Eliana: I’m ready Grandpa Jim.

Anya: Pappa Jim, maybe Eliana could stay and have tea with us just this once.

Jim: But we always go fishing on Wednesday.

Mabel: And Monday and Tuesday.

Elizabeth: And Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.

Jim: It beats sitting around minding other people’s business.

{The ladies all act very indignant.}

Mabel: Who says we mind other people’s business?

Jim: A skunk hide nailed to the smokehouse wall is still a skunk hide and don’t smell no better dipped in tea.

Anya: Maybe she could stay just this once since my mother is coming over for tea.

Jim: But I was taking Eliana with her Grandpa Ivan.

Anya: {Alarmed} With Father?!

Jim: Now don’t get your line wrapped around your rudder.  I would take care of her.  You know I love her as if she were my own.

Anya: I know but…

Jim: I promise, there will be no problem. I would not allow it.

Anya: You let her stay today, and you can take her tomorrow.

Eliana: But Momma, I don’t want to stay for a stupid tea party, I want to go fishing with…

Anya: Eliana, that is enough.  You can go tomorrow.

Jim: {Kneeling down to talk to Eliana.} We’ll just catch bigger fish tomorrow to make up for it.

Eliana: {Disappointed} All right.

Mabel: {To Jim as he is heading to the door.} It is for her own good you know.

Jim: Bunch of busy bodies.

{Just as Jim reaches the door there is a knock.  Jim opens the door and in steps Ivan and Katiana.  Ivan’s clothes can be something like no one ever saw before.  Anya and/or Agnes go to escort Katiana in.}

Ivan: I am ready to go fishing.

Jim: I am afraid we will not having Eliana with us today.  

Ivan: It is perhaps best.  Fishing is not women’s work anyway.

Eliana: But I am the best fisherman in all of Newfoundland.  Grandpa Jim told me so.

Jim: It is true.  She pretty well catches the biggest fish every time we go.  Well, I guess we best be going.

Eliana: But Grandpa Jim, I don’t want…

Jim: {Kneeling down and bringing her close.} Now you be a good girl and do as you momma says.  I’ll pick you up at 8:00 tomorrow and we’ll make a whole day of it if it’s alright with your momma.  {They both look at Anya and she smiles and nods.} Now you go help your momma get the tea ready. {He gives her a swat on the backside and sends her to the kitchen.}

{Jim and Ivan head for the door.}

Mabel: Rest assured that she’ll be learning important things of life while she’s here.

Jim: Like a sucker fish on a hook.    

{Jim and Ivan exit.}

Agnes: {Taking Katiana by the arm and bringing her over to the couch.} Now, Katiana, why don’t you tell us all about yourself.

Mabel: Can you first take that thing off your face?

Katiana: Is all man gone?

Elizabeth: Oh, yes.  No men come around to our tea.

{Katiana takes the veil off and is a very beautiful woman.}

Mabel: Now tell all about yourself.

Katiana: Katiana not know what say.

Elizabeth: What is it like living in your village?

Katiana: It much different than here.

Mabel: In what way?

Katiana: Women talk to men, even men not related.  Women no wear veil.  Food taste funny.  

Elizabeth: That’s just because Jim is cooking it.

{They all laugh.  While they are talking Agnes pours the tea and is passing it out.  Anya goes into the kitchen and brings in a can that says “SUGAR” .  Eliana sees it and tries to intercept her.}

Eliana: Uh, Mother, can I look in…

Anya: Eliana, it not polite to talk when someone is talking.

Eliana: But, Mother…

Anya: Eliana! {Everyone pauses to look at them.  Then Anya turns to the women.} Here’s the sugar for those who like sugar in their tea.

Mabel: {To Katiana} So are all men like your husband?

Katiana: I think so, but not know.  Woman not allowed talk to man not relative.

{As Katiana is talking and the women are asking questions they are dipping in the sugar tin not paying attention to the fact that what they are putting in their cups is black.  (This could be ground up oreos or such.)   Eliana tries to get to the can a here and there, but is rebuffed politely.  As the women talk Katiana gets more and more confused.}

Agnes: Does your husband always treat you that way?

Katiana: What way?

Agnes: You know, make you carry the luggage, things like that.

Katiana: Why, yes.  Woman should carry luggage.

Elizabeth: If a man ever treated me that way I would punch his lights out.

Katiana: What good smashing lanterns do?

Anya: No, mother.  Punch lights out means to hit him.

Katiana: That is very dangerous thing to do.  Man might get angry.

Mabel: Let him.  He can just sleep in the dog house.

{By now the women are starting to sip their tea.  Elizabeth gets a strange look.}

Katiana: Sleep in dog house?

Anya: That means she would throw him out of the house.

{By this time most of the women are starting to look in their tea cups, noting something is wrong.  Elizabeth acts like she is chewing.}

Elizabeth: Anya, did you put something in this tea?

Anya: No.  Why do you ask?

Elizabeth: Because I just got something chewy.

Mabel: And mine is full of black stuff.

Agnes: {Looking in the tea pot.} Th

Cultural Differences

Author: Daris Howard
     Daris Howard is an author and playwright who grew up on a farm in rural Idaho. He associated with many colorful characters including cowboys, farmers, lumberjacks and others.
     Daris and his wife, Donna, have ten children and were foster parents for several years. He has also worked in scouting and cub scouts, at one time having 18 boys in his scout troop.
     His plays, musicals, and books build on the characters of those he has associated with, along with his many experiences, to bring his work to life.
    He and his family have enjoyed running a summer community theatre where he gets a chance to premiere his theatrical works and rework them to make them better. His published plays and books can be seen at http://www.darishoward.com. He has plays translated into German and French and his work has been done in many countries around the world.
     In the last few years, Daris has started writing books and short stories. He writes a popular news column called Life’s Outtakes, that consists of weekly short stories and is published in various newspapers and magazines in the U.S. and Canada and has won many awards for his writing.

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